A Valentine’s Day She Will Never Forget

Bacon Roses

How To Make Bacon Roses

Alright guys, I know V-Day is coming up fast, and you’re probably desperate for some ideas, so Chef is going to fill you in on what to give your Valentine for this special occasion without sacrificing your man card. Follow the simple step-by step directions below to create your very own Z-Poc inspired love letter, and then follow the link attached to the bacon roses picture for instructions on how to make these delicious looking treats.

Zombie Apocalypse Inspired Love Letter

You will need:
2 pieces of high quality black colored paper.
1 white or silver colored sharpie or gel marker.
A box of chocolates or her favorite candy

Continue reading

Zombies Out… Genies are the new scourge of the apocalypse!

I’ve been gone for a few days due to some personal stuff and when I come back (I’m not completely back yet) look at the first thing I look at when I open my email which has for some reason been sent 18 times from different people…

A Saudi defense lawyer has asked court to summon a GENIE claimed to have possessed a judge who has been arrested on corruption charges, the Saudi Arabic language daily Okaz reported on Saturday. Forget the Zombie Apocalypse… Bring on the Genie Apocalypse! I take a lot of flack from people saying that there is no such thing nor will there EVER be such a thing as a “zombie”. Well I say if there can be Genies… then there most certainly be ZOMBIES!

The case of the corrupt judge in Madina has taken a new turn and witnessed new developments as the lawyer of an absent defendant has asked court to summon the Genie to testify, the paper said.

If what the accused judge said about the jinn, then this jinn could be bad and blasphemous…this jinn could have been sent by a bad sorcerer because witchcraft is bad and non-Islamic.

In a report on the case early this week, Okaz said the accused judge told court he was under a magic spell a Genie when he was involved in such practices.

The Don’t Get Bit Trifold Brochure On Zombie Awareness! Download it Today!

Click Here to Download the FREE PDF!

Our sole purpose here at Don’t Get Bit is to educate the masses about not only the INEVITABLE zombie apocalypse but how to SURVIVE said Zombie Apocalypse. What better way to reach out to the non-zombie aware people out there than to create a beautiful trifold brochure! This is just the first draft and I am counting on all of you to help make this the most epic trifold brochure ever. So feel free to download the FREE PDF and check it out. Make sure to leave some comments if I misspelled anything or any tweeks that you may think it needs. Please forward it on to anyone that you think might need some help in getting prepared for the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE! I am going to print about 10,000 of these so let’s make sure it’s right!

Click here to download the PDF!

Don’t Get Bit’s 2011 Top Ten Most Viewed Website Posts!

Well another year has come and gone. 2011 will soon be a distant memory and in just a few days it will be on to 2012… and the end of everything on this planet as we know it. But in the meantime here are the top 10 posts on Don’t Get Bit for 2011! As a special gift to all the ladies who liked Don’t Get Bit this year, this is the most viewed picture on our Facebook page… oddly enough it’s me! Thank you to everyone who made this Don’t Get Bit’s best year EVAH! Hopefully next year will be even better and we will get even more epic in our attempt to teach you that YOU CAN SURVIVE THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!

10. This Is How It Starts: Man Accused of Eating Raw Meat at Walmart.
9. This Is How It Starts: Girl Found Eating Herself In Cage In Mobile Home.
8. Zombies… Meet the Mossberg 500!
7. Weapon Pron: Kel-Tec’s New Shotgun… The KSG!
6. DIY Zombie Apocalypse Armor: Can Tabs Chain Mail.
5. Toshiba Zombie Commercial. (Also the most commented on)
4. This Is How It Starts: Woman Thought Dead Found Breathing and Moving!
3. Zombie Survival Kit. (Technically this is a page and not a post.)
2. Apocalypse Fears Spur Bunker Sales.
1. Self-Aiming Sniper Rifles… Sexy!

This is how it starts: Man digs hole for pool in yard, finds cemetery.

(Video Added) All of us at Don’t Get Bit spend our time on the blog trying to both keep you prepared and informed about the Zombie Apocalypse. Once again we bring to you… “This is How It Starts: Man digs hole for pool in yard, finds cemetery.”

When a man decided to dig a plot in his New Orleans backyard for a swimming pool, he ended up discovering a historic cemetery that dates back to the 1700s.

It’s not the first time bodies have been discovered underground in the area – in 1984, 36 corpses were found when an apartment complex was being built.

Part 5 – Making It Edible: A How-To Guide on Food Safety and Awareness In the Zombie Apocalypse

Part 5…

Deliciously Dangerous Mushrooms

So you want to harvest wild plants, survive raging rapids with only a holey plastic bag, and be just like Bear Grylls in every way possible, eh? Well you go for it, and while you’re at it, remember to drink your piss at least four times in a week. It’s essential for the manliness factor.

However, if you want to be a real man (or woman) and not DIE, you should probably learn some wilderness essentials first. A great place to start is with harvesting wild plants, like mushrooms. Continue reading

Part 4 – Making It Edible: A How-To Guide on Food Safety and Awareness In the Zombie Apocalypse

Part 4…

Vines, Brambles, and Other Natural Zombie Deterrents

So you’ve got yourself this nice little patch of land, growing yourself a sustainable bit of food and livestock, and all of a sudden, you’re hit with a band of undead intruders. You’ve got the ammo to dispatch them, but probably not enough time before they get to you and start killing off survivors in your colony. Not everyone is well enough to climb or be lifted to a rooftop for protection. So what do you do? Having all these things set up with no way to protect yourself or your supplies is obviously a bad idea. How do you slow down the hoard?

First of all, remember that we are doing our best to depend on nature for all sorts of self-tending zombie deterrents. You’ve got rivers, cliffs, hills, mountains, caves, trees, etc., etc., etc. Why build everything from extremely valuable materials that are difficult to acquire if you have Mother Nature to assist you? Of course you would want to use these things as often as possible to help you and your team effectively avoid or reroute zombies when you have them, but what about giving nature a little encouragement to do things your way and supplement your efforts? Say, for example, growing a natural wall of brambles and vines to prevent the undead from entering a particular area or path. This is totally do-able, and I would recommend finding yourself some nasty weed seeds ( not the drug type, you potheads) to plant around your safe house and form thick, tangling barriers that the zeds are unable to rip through without expending a significant amount of time, giving you enough of a window to kill them all and dispose of the corpses.

You can also create dry or filled motes of course, which is a popular theme in zombie literature these days. The benefit to having a mote around your safe house is that it not only slows zombies, but also prevents raiders and other unsavory folk or dangerous critters that would rather take your supplies or food than eat your brains from simply waltzing in to your post-apocalyptic home. Collect tree sap – nature’s tar – and use it an emergency fire starter, or for the sake of epicness (I think I just made a new word), save it to pour into the mote and set ablaze if all hell breaks loose. Call it “The Zombie Incinerator” and tell all your friends about it so they don’t go playing tricks on you or being stupid and ending up as crispy shishkabobs after the Z-Poc hits.

Nearly everyone admits that a body of water separating you from the mainland does not mean that you are safe from zombies, since the freaks can walk underwater indefinitely and eventually reach you on the other side. However, you should never underestimate the power of the water’s current. If you are on one side of a river with raging rapids and sharp rocks throughout, and zombies are on the other, it is highly unlikely that with their lack of coordination that they could ever reach you by crossing the river. You may have to deal with them later, once they have finally stopped being tossed around and smacked against rocks, and crawl their way up the bank of the river five miles downstream, but hey, that’s way better than just letting them walk straight to you. This type of natural deterrent is beneficial in two ways: 1. you have a source of water that can be purified for consumption or used to generate power, and 2. it deters zombies and other creatures from crossing over that area.

There are many other naturally occurring zombie deterrents, and I encourage you to continue researching them. This article is simply intended to get the gears turning. Survival and application is, of course, up to you.

Next week: Dangerously Delicious Mushrooms

This is how it starts: Two men took friend’s corpse on boys’ night out!

All of us at Don’t Get Bit spend our time on the blog trying to both keep you prepared and informed about the Zombie Apocalypse. So once again we bring to you… “This is How It Starts”. In today’s edition, Two men took friend’s corpse on boys’ night out. Robert Jeffrey Young, 43, and Mark Rubinson, 25, discovered their friend Jeffrey Jarrett dead but delayed reporting the find to police so they could first have a free night out. Continue reading

This is how it starts: They’re coming to get you, Barbara, there’s one of them now!

(UPDATE BELOW WITH SKETCH OF THE ATTACKER!) All of us at Don’t Get Bit spend our time on the blog trying to both keep you prepared and informed about the Zombie Apocalypse. Once again we bring to you… “This is How It Starts”. This example is exactly how the cult Romero classic “Night of the Living Dead” started. The woman told police she was sexually assaulted as she returned to her vehicle from visiting a cemetery plot. She struggled with her assailant and was able to break free. She ran to the Orbit Drive residence. Hopefully she didn’t leave her unconscious brother behind. Continue reading