The Rules

Terms And Conditions

These are Terms And Conditions for joining our team. These rules can also be used for your team. Treat these Terms And Conditions for joining our team as if they’re the 10 Commandments of Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse. These rules can change depending on your needs, some may be added with no notice. Stay tuned for updates to the rules and come back soon for a PDF version of these rules that will be in the form of a contract that can be signed by perspective members.

  • All team members must agree there is no cure for being a zombie. There is one cure to the Infection… We are the cure.
  • All prospective “Team Members” must agree that their only purpose after signing this contract is to survive and to ensure that their “Team Members” are their first priority.
  • All prospective “Team Members” must agree that if they are bitten by zombie/zombies they will disclose said bite in a timely manner so as not to endanger the other “Team Members”.
  • All prospective “Team Members” must agree to be shot in the head if bitten by a zombie/zombies. There are 2 scenarios to consider with this, depending on the type of zombie virus. This becomes tricky given that there is a possibility that there could be best friends, loved ones, parents, girlfriends etc. on the team so this point is paramount before joining.
    • If it is a virus that waits until death to turn you into a zombie, i.e. you will have to die of the bite/injuries before turning (Dawn of the Dead), then the head shot can wait until the  “Team Members” say goodbye to everyone and their loved ones, should there be any there with them. The moment they die… then they get a head shot. Unless of course they choose to off themselves.  All head-shots will be administered by a volunteer.
    • If the virus is a fast one that turns them into a zombie almost immediately (28 Days Later) then they agree that the head shot can happen immediately so as to save the other “Team Members” from them. All head-shots will be administered by a volunteer.
  • All prospective “Team Members” agree that, should the time come they will in-fact give up their own lives to save any of the other “Team Members” should there be no other choice. The good of the many outweigh the needs of the few.
  • All “Team Members” agree to share all survival gear they have with them or they find in the future with the team and that hoarding will lead to immediate dismissal and a permanent ban from the team, meaning certain death.
  • All orders must be followed by the “Team Members” regardless of the possible outcome. All orders will be agreed upon by a voting majority of the team and the final orders will be approved by the team leader. Anyone caught not following orders will lead to immediate dismissal and a permanent ban from the team, meaning certain death.
  • Don’t get bit. All precautions must be taken at all times to ensure safety. Anyone caught not living up to team standards will be punished based on the infraction. All punishments will be decided my a majority vote and the final decision will be approved by the team leader, possibly leading to immediate dismissal and a permanent ban from the team, meaning certain death.
  • Anyone caught abandoning their post or anyone caught deserting will lead to immediate dismissal and a permanent ban from the team, meaning certain death.
  • Anyone caught trying to befriend/train/empathize with a zombie/zombies will lead to immediate dismissal and a permanent ban from the team, meaning certain death.
  • All team members must agree to dispatch all zombies with great haste. Anyone caught toying with zombie/zombies, will be punished based on the severity. Unless a consensus agrees that toying with said zombie/zombies was hilarious and/or dynamic in nature.
  • All team members agree that physical fitness is a priority and a necessity to Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse. The most important being Cardio. Fitness tests will be given quarterly and anyone found to not be physically fit will be punished. Punishments will be decided my a majority vote and the final decision will be approved by the team leader. The punishment will be most likely half-rations and a crap-load of squats.
  • All team members agree that Fight Training is a necessity and training sessions will be held daily. Training sessions will include hand-to-hand combat, weapons training and evasion techniques. All members must attend the sessions or face punishment.

These rules can be changed at any time. Be sure you have the most updated Terms And Conditions with you at all times. If any of you have any rules that should be added please post them in the comments section below. That is all.

57 comments on “The Rules

    • If you have a talent or knowledge base that we feel is vital to the Survival Team then yes. You will serve 30 days as a “Red-Shirt” and will require at least 3 zombie or survival links and synopsis of the info on the links to be submitted weekly. To become a full fledged member you must answer 3 questions at the end of the 30 day trial. There are no fees.

      • Ok. And also about the Fight Training, where do you have to go to do the training? I would love to learn the correct way of how to blow some undead corpse’s heads off!!

      • We take Krav Maga the official self defense system of the Israeli Defense Forces. Krav is an eclectic hand-to-hand combat system developed in Israel that involves wrestling, grappling and striking techniques, mostly known for its extremely efficient and brutal counter-attacks, as it is also taught to elite special forces around the world. Classes should be available in your area.

  1. How do I join? I am a firearms expert, survivalist and have been studying zombies since i was 11. I can pop a zombie head at 500 yards and clear 10 zombies with a pistol in 7 seconds. I also practice knife fighting daily as well as staff and sword use. So… do i qualify
    (if proof of any of the above claims is needed i can provide it in video form)

    • Sorry Dakota. We’ve already got our weapons specialist. BUT… a fight to the death between you and Douglas could prove who’s the better specialist. OK… Douglas is yelling at me as I’m typing that he’s “too busy” for ANOTHER fight to the death… sounds like an excuse Douglas! Well Dakota, send us some links to us that are weapon/zombie liquification related and we’ll put them up. Prove your grit and we’ll talk more.

    • DAKOTA. I need you to get a hold of me. I received and email this morning from a step-mother, Davina, who is looking for you. I notified them that I will not be giving up your IP address as they requested so as to ensure your privacy unless the police contact me directly. Please email me asap dontgetbit@gmail.com.

    • Hey there Shika! Currently membership to the Survival Team is closed. However I am looking for someone interested in sending us links and articles on all things zombie related. Once I know you’re serious then you will be considered for membership. Send all links or post ideas to dontgetbit@gmail.com and you will be credited for your vigilance. For now subscribe to the blog on the right hand side and good hunting. Remember … Don’t Get Bit!

  2. HOW THE HELL DO I JOIN
    IM EXPERT AT FIXING AND BUILDING ITEMS OUT OF ALMOST ANYTHING YOU CAN BUILD WITH AND HAVE BEEN WATCHING ZOMBIE MOVIES SINCE I WAS THREE AND HAVE STUDIED ZOMBIES SINCE I WAS FIVE YEARS OLD

  3. I definately agree to the terms. I’m not sure if I could be useful, but I have a few talents. I’m multi-lingual. I can speak English, German, Spanish, Greek and Chinese, as well as a little Russian (which is kind of broken, even with the few words and phrases I know). I am also a long distance runner. My mile time is 6:04 and I can go like that for about 5 miles until I start slowing down to a 6:56 mile and can go like that for another 3 before having to stop. I’m aslo quite small for my age but I was raised as a marine brat so I’m no wimp. Any scouting for the team going on or do you recomend I start my own?

  4. Love the rules, but 28 Days Later wasnt zombies. They were infected and full of rage so could withstand alot of pain, but once dead they didn’t rise again and a head shot wasnt necessary. At the end of the movie the government stayed away until the infected ppl had finally starved and died. To my understanding a true zombie is one who has the virus, either dies from it or at death, comes back craving living flesh and you must sever the brain stem or destroy the brain.
    Am i mistaken?

    • We here at DGB accept both 28 Days Later and Dawn of the Dead as zombies. We often say that the 28 Days infected is of course the most plausable and it is what we expect to see when it goes down. Both die with a headshot.

  5. i agree to these terms and accept. I have been getting real good with an AK, my soon to be husband got me some zombie shooting targets for x-mas!!!!!

    • I carry 2 machetes on my bug-out-bag. However swords are not always a good idea. First you have to be close up. Second, killing something with a sword is not as easy as you’d think. Sword-masters train for year to become proficient in the art of killing.

  6. Like your rules. I’ve been in the Army for 15 years now. I’m a demolition expert, urban mobility breacher (explosives and shotgun), malaysian tracker, combat life saver, 4 combat deployments and shoot expert everytime i qualify. Got any room for me?

    • We are always looking for good women and men to write for us. Send me an email with a sample post and we’ll chat more. No more than 3 paragraphs and links to all the info.

  7. I can drive anything you put me into. I have driven fast cars slow cars trucks vans. and i aint half bad at fixing them either!

  8. I’ve been having zombie apocalypse dreams almost every month this year, it’s crazy, getting to 2 dreams a night…the time is near, get ready boys!

  9. There are a lot of rules. But I can get more. I have some others in mind. And you can also watch Zombie movies lik ZombieLand that has Emma Stone in it, there are rules in there, too.

  10. what the fuck am i reading?! are you guys like the biggest trollgroup ever or are you really THAT retarded? and how the hell did i end up here reading all those comments….rofl

  11. can i be on the team as a the teams fighter ill be the one that u leav to take care of the zombies so the rest of the team can runs to saftey

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